News from Off-Center

Space junk, goats and Gaga

by Ed Wenck — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 15:01:00 GMT

A retired satellite is hurtling toward the atmosphere and pieces of it could crash into the Earth as early as Friday.

The grand champion goat from this year's Colorado State Fair and another goat raised by the same family were disqualified after testing positive for an unapproved feed additive. Yes, you heard me – the goat was allegedly on the juice.

Pop star Lady Gaga has won an injunction stopping the makers of an online children's game from promoting an animated character called Lady Goo Goo.

News from Off Center RETURNS!

by Ed Wenck — Fri, 07 Oct 2011 16:24:00 GMT

A new Guinness World Record was set over the weekend for the largest bikini parade. 357 women helped claim the title on the Gold Coast, in Queensland, Australia on Sunday. The old record was set last year in the Cayman Islands, with 331 bikini-wearers. Yes, there’s video. And yes, single guys will want to immediately move to Queensland.

Demias Jimerson is such a dominant running back that his league has reinstated a "mercy" rule. It bars him from scoring a touchdown if he has already scored three times and his team is ahead by 14 or more points. League officials say they aren't trying to punish Jimerson. They just want to make sure the other 21 players on the field stay involved. Demias is 11 years old.

Pennsylvania State Police are looking for a steel bridge worth an estimated $100,000 that was dismantled and taken from a rural area. Police said they believe a torch was used to cut apart the bridge, which measured 50 feet by 20 feet, near Covert's Crossing in North Beaver Township.

Doughnuts, Speedos, and World Records

by Ed Wenck — Wed, 24 Aug 2011 15:58:00 GMT

It took an undercover operation, but Greek police have busted a violent ring of alleged crooks who had cornered the doughnut market in a beach resort.

A 61-year-old New York man says he lost his job as a lifeguard when he refused to wear skimpy swim trunks for the annual swim test.

The “Stop, Drop and Roll” event at the Iowa State Fair on Sunday, an attempt to set a record for the most people simultaneously executing the fire-safety mantra, unofficially exceeded the current world record by almost 1,000 participants.

A Week's Worth of Weird!

by Ed Wenck — Thu, 18 Aug 2011 20:46:00 GMT

A gold-plated super-yacht that is claimed to be worth $4.5 billion has been built for an anonymous businessman.

An alleged brawl in East Texas over the affections of one man has led to the arrest of seven women.

An unsteady forklift dropped a container full of fine Australian wine worth more than $1 million, smashing most of the bottles.

Military scientists are trying to determine if a skull found in Pearl Harbor among debris dating to the 1940s belonged to a World War II Japanese fighter pilot.

Nepal has ordered a new measurement of Mount Everest to determine exactly how high the world's highest mountain is.

An al-Qaida affiliate says it plans to roll out what some have called a Disney-like animated cartoon aimed at recruiting children to the terror network.

Santas from all over the world are attending this year's 54th World Santa Claus Congress, throwing sacks of presents and throwing canon balls in a new physical fitness contest.

MD police say two men who tried to carjack a vehicle ran off when they found out the car had a stick shift.

A bungee ride in Dallas apparently arranged by a woman to help her future husband face his fear of heights turned into a three-hour ordeal 50 feet up when the cables got tangled.

A 17-year-old Amish youth faces a host of charges after Buffalo sheriff's deputies said they saw him driving a buggy while holding an open can of beer and then led police on a brief chase.

Police say a Michigan bride — still in her wedding dress — was arrested on a felony warrant and briefly jailed after exchanging vows.

Eating starchy snacks like french fries and potato chips actually trigger the production of natural, marijuana-like chemicals in the body that make it difficult to stop eating the fatty foods, new research shows.

Here’s a story we received from the IUPUI police. I’ll post it exactly as it was sent:

IU Health employees reported a male behaving erratically and officers made contact with a visitor who stated he was on the way to Riley Hospital to run for president. The male refused to calm down and was arrested for Disorderly Conduct and Public Intoxication. He was also arrested for Possession of Paraphernalia and Possession of a Synthetic Cannabinoid; transported to Wishard Detention. He was issued a trespass warning for all IUPUI property.

Mark Cuban is My Hero

by Ed Wenck — Mon, 27 Jun 2011 20:49:00 GMT

Minority partners in the Mavericks, the Hillwood Investment Properties, had sued Mark Cuban, alleging that he spent too much money on the team and should have instead paid out to the partners. And what did Cuban do?

Delaware County Ohio Sheriff's Office says deputies responded to a call about a domestic dispute early Saturday, and a man told them his wife was drinking at a wedding and hit him before locking herself in a car. When cops approached the woman, she allegedly sprayed them with breast milk.

For months, someone had been marking up posters in the New York City subway with a distinctive, cursive script version of the word “moustache.” Police say they nabbed him.

Russell Tellup gave a Domino's Pizza delivery driver a $20 check for a pizza and the check bounced. You won't believe what THAT cost.

New York State Police troopers say 20-year-old Sean Schmidt was standing with his upper body sticking out of the sunroof of a vehicle traveling on Interstate 190 in Buffalo late Monday night. When a trooper following in a state police cruiser activated the car lights to pull the other vehicle over, Schmidt threw a small bag of marijuana, which landed on the hood of the trooper's car.

Anthony Weiner's High School Yearbook Picture

by Ed Wenck — Fri, 10 Jun 2011 19:47:00 GMT

Facebook, Cupcakes, and Famous Sheep

by Ed Wenck — Tue, 07 Jun 2011 22:05:00 GMT

A teenage girl in Germany who forgot to mark her birthday invitation as private on Facebook fled her own party when more than 1,500 guests showed up.

British intelligence agency MI6 and Britain's Government Communications Headquarters cooked up a cyberattack and hacked into terror group Al Qaeda's website and replaced bomb-making instructions with cupcake recipes,

A Utah man has been cited on a charge of disorderly conduct after paying for a disputed medical bill with 2,500 pennies.

New Zealanders are mourning the loss of the country's most famous sheep.

Beer, cocaine, nudity - and Family Guy!

by Ed Wenck — Wed, 11 May 2011 15:42:00 GMT

A 65-year-old man from Bridgeport, CT faces criminal charges after he called 911 three times on Sunday. Authorities say when emergency personnel arrived at the home of Raymond Roberge, Ray offered them money to go to the store and buy him some beer.

A Hispanic man traveling through western North Carolina was charged with possession of 91 pounds of cocaine, but it turns out he was only carrying tortilla dough, cooking flour and shrimp.

A 25-year-old woman was arrested for indecent exposure after she was seen dancing completely nude in the Mesa Arizona Cemetery on Friday morning.

Barbara Warburton is a member of the Parents Television Council. Barabara and some like-minded folks have been lobbying for the cancellation of the FOX TV show ‘Family Guy’. This may make for an uncomfortable Thanksgiving dinner at some point. Barb’s son is Patrick Warburton, the voice of Joe Swanson on ‘Family Guy’.

By the Numbers

by Ed Wenck — Fri, 06 May 2011 00:19:00 GMT

The Indiana Secretary of State's Office initially included the wrong number in a news release about the Hoosier Voter Hotline that was activated for Tuesday's primaries. Instead of a 1-866 prefix, the release listed it as a 1-800 number. People who called the number were directed to another number where they could talk to "hot" girls.

An Oregon man bought a car on Craigslist - a 1998 Audi with 77,000 miles on her. Once the sale was completed, the buyer drove away in the Audi and noticed the odometer was going in reverse.

Monty Python member John Cleese divorced his third wife in 2008, and the alimony has been expensive. In order to pay the settlement – valued at around 12 million pounds – his 40-year-old girlfriend Jennifer Wade is helping to pay those bills by modeling nude.

A Colorado man who tried to capture Osama bin Laden is demanding a share of the official $27 million reward following the terror chief's death. Gary Faulkner, a construction worker from Greeley, Colo., came to international attention after being arrested in Pakistan last year with a variety of weapons including a samurai sword.

Pot, wings, cuffs and lady-parts

by Ed Wenck — Tue, 03 May 2011 16:12:00 GMT

Cops in Wales busted a huge indoor pot farming operation and arrested 4 Vietnamese men. After word of the bust hit the press, two cops were posted at the front of the building to guard the weed, but two thieves who also read the papers snuck in through another entrance and stole 30 grand worth of dope.

If you're in Buffalo and see a man handcuffed to a chair, call police. They'd like the chair back, along with the guy shackled to it.

Last Sunday, a gallery in New York offered adventurous eaters the opportunity to sample cheese made from human breast milk. The creator said of the cheeses: "Some people are loving it, and some people are gagging."