Ari's Movie Review
Scary Clowns and Stupid Kids- IT Movie Review
Photo Credit-Bertrand Guay/Getty Images
Producer Ari's Weekly Movie Review
I went to go see IT with my girlfriend. We both like scary movies and based off the previews I made sure to bring a spare pair of boxers uncase I peed myself from terror.
Movie starts and legit like 5 minutes in we see Pennywise. I’m not scared of clowns or anything, but this freak show is on another level of creepy. Pennywise is lurking around in a sewer, finds this cute little kid and munches his arm right off. So right off the bat I’m thinking this movie is about be nuts.
I turn to my girlfriend and give her the thumbs up, but she’s like repulsed that this horrific mutilation just took place. Damn girl, this movie is rated R for gore. What did you expect?
Anyways, movie gets going. We meet the gang of kids the movie is about. Yea, they’re likable and all, but I already can tell they’re not too bright. They keep seeing Pennywise, a disturbing looking clown, around town. Then like 4 other kids suddenly “go missing” and none of these dummies have the brain capacity to go to the cops and say,
“Hey, we all saw this weird looking dude dressed like a clown roaming around town. Maybe he’s involved with all these missing kids.”
So now the gang decides that their group, a rag-tag assembly of 10 year-olds is clearly the best option to take down a murderous clown monster. They go to his lair with like slingshots and a baseball bat. Obviously that doesn’t end well and they flee in terror. So now they suddenly realize that they are completely ill equipped to handle this situation. They proceed to have a big fight and disband. For the first time in the movie, the kids are acting logically and come to the decision that they are not going to mess with this clown anymore.
Well, this brief display of logic lasts about 5 minutes before they decide yet again that they should go kill the clown. I hate stupid people.
They all crawl down this dark abandoned well, and sure enough they find Pennywise. He’s acting all happy because he can’t believe a group of kids was dumb enough to stumble into his house.
They use the power of love, or some crap like that and seemingly defeat him. During the fight they all discover that Pennywise comes back every 27 years to wreak havoc. They proceed to make a blood vow to all return and kill him again.
Movie ends, the girlfriend and I go home. We both liked the movie, but I still insist we keep a bat or some weapon by the bed just in case Pennywise breaks in.