Abdul At Large
Well, that was interesting, to say the least.
Out of a combined sense of morbid curiosity, mixed in with writing about most things political, I went and saw Stormy Daniels at the Pony Strip Club on Indianapolis’ west side.
Now please note I freely admit this was not my first adult-oriented rodeo. I went to law school in St. Louis in the early 2000s, and the East St. Louis area, I truly believe, has more strip clubs per capita than any place in the country outside of Las Vegas. I’ve seen dancers that I wanted to marry (but only for a week or two) and some that I would pay them to keep their clothes on. That’s also where I learned that you take $2 bills with you because in the bad light they look just like $20s. So when I went, I knew I had a basis for my opinion.
And in my opinion, it was okay. She didn't talk about Trump, nor did I expect her to, but there was more than enough for me to write about.
First of all, there was confusion about the show times. Us media folks thought the show times were 7 p.m. and 9 p.m. It turns out the times were 9 p.m. and 11 p.m. But someone didn't communicate that with Daniels, and she came out at 10 p.m, but hey, things happen, right?
Inside, it was your usual strip club, for the most part. Girls named "Diamond" and "London" danced on a pole to Aerosmith's "Rag Doll" and Robert Palmer's "Simply Irresistible." And I will admit to being somewhat impressed with the one who danced to "Here Comes the Hotstepper." You have to be a member of Generation X to fully appreciate that one, but I digress. Like I said, it was your typical strip club for the most part. However, there were a lot more older folks than you would think and a lot more women. I genuinely believe they were there out of morbid curiosity.
That said, Daniels’ “performance” didn’t get off to the best start. The recorded DJ voice announced her to Cat Scratch Fever and she didn’t show. I could tell the owner, who was a real nice guy, by the way, was getting nervous. So he went back to find out what was going on. Apparently, Daniels was still on her tour bus, so they played the same intro again, and she came in leopard tights to ‘Welcome to the Jungle". She did her song and dance, and overall I thought on a scale of one to ten, one being you owe me money, ten is where have you been all my life, she was a 6. It was okay, but if you missed it, you didn't miss much.
To be honest, I found the audience more entertaining than her. (Cue my inner Jane Goodall) I find it fascinating watching horny young guys and borderline creepy older guys when it comes to strippers. When she had a blanket placed on the floor, lied down on it, and they played a Nine Inch Nail Song (Gen X’ers, you know which one), the crowd gathered around like starving third-world villages at a U.N. food drop. I was a little surprised when she closed out her set to Toto's Africa. I'll never be able to hear the line " There's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do" the same way ever again.
I did observe Daniels when she was signing autographs and taking pictures, and I could sense that she seemed to be just going through the motions. She wasn't rude but having a performance background, I know the look and the vibe when all you want to do is go home and call it a day. But she was a trooper and got through it. I think it's fair to say that wasn't the first time and it won't be the last.
So what’s the moral of the story? You’ve seen one stripper/adult entertainer you’ve basically seen them all. This one just allegedly hooked up with the President of the United States and is now in the middle of a multi-million dollar lawsuit. I don’t regret going, although I do wish she would have autographed my reporter's notepad. I would have loved for her to write “To Abdul, thanks for coming. Stormy” Oh well, maybe next time.