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UnCooped: Sniffing Your Partner's Methane Emissions Could Help Ward Off Disease

Daisy: "This is why women live longer."

(Science and Society Foundation/Getty Images)

Great news for all you fine, fart-sniffing folk of the land: smelling your partner's ass gas is both delightful AND of nutritional health benefit, according to researchers at the University of Exeter!

Hydrogen sulfide, aka "ass gas," can help reduce the risk of heart attack, stroke, cancer, and dementia! 

When we are sick, our cells create their own hydrogen sulfide, which helps keep the mitochondria – our cell’s power generators – in working order.

Without the gas, the cells die and lose their ability to fight off disease. So sniff on, fart sniffers!

Mock:

"So if your husband delivers the ass gas, that cells draw in the enzymes from the ass gas, which keeps the cells healthy."

Daisy:

"So he's helping me live. I'm not going to thank him directly, but I'll just know in my heart that he's contributing to my long-term health. This is why women live longer!

Mock:

"Yes, because they produce the ass gas more frequently, which in turn, benefits our health."

Daisy:

"So in a way, if a man has difficulty expressing his feelings verbally, we know that by farting in our general direction, he's really saying 'I love you.'"

Treat your spouse to a dutch oven delight today! And also, click the link below to hear more from the Chicks on the Right:

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