Full Throttle Bat Crap: Cardi B. Considering Career in Politics

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Full Throttle Bat Crap: Cardi B. Considering Career in Politics

Yes, The Girl Who Told Vogue She Enjoys Smelling Her Own Flatulence.

(Kevin Mazur / Contributor / Getty Images)

Great news, fellow American voters! Rapper, television personality and snazzy dresser Cardi B. is considering a run for political office. The 27-year-old shoe thrower who was recently indicted in New York on 14 criminal charges, including two counts of felony assault with intent to cause serious physical injury, triggered uncontrollable laughter across the nation Sunday after tweeting out her political aspirations.

We now bring you that Tweet in its entirety:

Cardi B.

"Our nation is under attack from within. Partisan agendas, attacks on law-enforcement officers, and hateful, divisive rhetoric are tearing the country apart. I call on our elected officials in Washington to peacefully come together, seek compromise, and earnestly work not for the benefit of Republicans or Democrats, but for the benefit of all Americans - regardless of race, color or creed. I announce to you today that I will actively seek political office so that I might give back to the nation that has graciously and generously given so much to me."

Just kidding; I made that up.

Here's what Cardi B. tweeted out:

Minus two for spelling and grammar, Cardi.

Oh, who am I kidding? President Trump's tweets have more errors in them than Grammarly Premium can keep up with. Cardi gets a pass.

Speaking of things that you pass, political hopeful Cardi B. recently sat down with Vogue to discuss her passion for inhaling her own flatulence.

Gosh, you know what? Maybe that's why House Speaker Nancy Pelosi talks so funny: brain damage from one too many self-inflicted dutch ovens.

The Chicks on the Right have more on Cardi B.'s political aspirations in the clip below.

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