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Bad News: Michael Avenatti is NOT Running for President

And there was weeping and gnashing of teeth...

(Michael S. Schwartz/Getty Images)

Bad news, kids: Creepy Porn Lawyer, Michael Avenatti will be denying the American people the pleasure of his inclusion in the next Presidential race. 

After months of meetings and speaking events designed to lay the groundwork for a possible Presidential bid, the highly-distinguished legal representative for porn star and stripper, Stormy Daniels announced Tuesday he will not run in 2020.

Avenatti said the decision came after consultation with his family.

"I do not make this decision lightly — I make it out of respect for my family. But for their concerns, I would run," Avenatti, a father of two teenage girls and a 4-year-old boy, said in a statement.

Well, crap! Looks like we'll have to hope that the Democrats will roll Hillary's old bones out of liberal storage for one more shot at the title! Pray for the best; otherwise, we're going to be bored to tears during the 2020 election cycle.

Hammer and Nigel weigh-in on 'quitter' Avenatti in the following clip:

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