The Hammer and Nigel Show
Guy Finds Stranger in His Home "Nuking My Butter"
(Screen Capture: ABC 13 News)
A sombrero-wearing man in Virginia with a taste for Natty Light found a complete and total stranger in his kitchen, attempting to microwave his butter.
Zach McGuire said he heard voices coming from his kitchen, but thought it was his aunt or grandmother. He soon realized, however, that the voice belonged to a stranger.
McGuire, dressed in his favorite sombrero, gave an exclusive interview to local news station WSET. He drank his favorite beer and made butter jokes throughout the entire thing, and it's Emmy-worthy television to say the least.
"I came flying out here into the kitchen, and she’s standing right there in front of the microwave, getting ready to nuke my butter. And I told her she 'butter' not," McGuire told WSET.
McGuire - no relation to Mark - made the woman sit on the floor while he waited for the police to come.
“She was spaced out, delusional, probably hadn’t slept in like two or three days," McGuire said. "She didn’t know where she was at, or she tried to act like she didn’t know where she was at."
In order to avoid the potential for future butter theft, McGuire said he will employ a revolutionary security method in which homeowners keep their doors locked.
“B-Y-O-B means 'bring your own butter,'" he added.
WIBC's Hammer and Nigel covered this and the story of a man who posted video of the "shortest hit and run in history" in today's edition of "Is This Anything?"