What Age Are You The Most Miserable?

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What Age Are You The Most Miserable?

A New Study Reveals That Middle Age Sucks, But It Gets Better

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There's good news for extraordinarily unhappy people who happen to be exactly 47.2 years old today: your miserable, self-loathing, and joyless existence is at its absolute peak of SUCKO! Why is that good news? Because a new survey claims greater happiness is just around the corner!

Dartmouth College Professor David Blanchflower (We love his work) studied data from 132 countries examining the relationship between well-being and age. According to Prof. Blanchflower, each country has we he calls a "happiness curve” that takes on a U shape over one’s lifetime, and 47.2 years of age is the bottom of that curve for persons in developed nations.

Persons in developing nations don't hit their maximum "miserable bastard" status until age 48.2, according to Blanchflower, although the reason for the discrepancy is unclear.

FAQ: What the hell is the "happiness curve?"

Answer: Basically, you're as happy in your 70s as you were in your 20s. Put another way, if you can make it through the misery of middle age, your joy will increase. 

Disclaimer: If you die before the age of 50, you're highly unlikely to enjoy your 60s & 70s.

FAQ: Why does 47.2 years of age suck for most people?

Answer: Mid to late 40s is when most people realize that their dreams and goals are never going to be reached and it's way too late to start over. Once you accept that, however, you tend to appreciate what you DO have.

Exciting News: If you suffer severe memory issues in your later years, you won't even remember what the hell your dreams were to begin with! That's why people in their 90s are usually happy as sh*t.

Want proof? Say hello to "Flossie!"

Does she seem unhappy? Heck, no! She's on 1% battery and barely knows where the hell she is!

Hammer and Nigel offer some additional half-baked, yet entirely plausible theories for why older people are so happy in the clip below.

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