Hollywood is a special place that nourishes the souls of creative people and encourages performers to ONLY engage in physically, mentally, and emotionally healthy behavior… As long as that healthy behavior is financially advantageous for producers and executives. Take care of yourselves and all, sensitive artists, but those Ferarri leases aren’t going to pay themselves.
Actress Rebel Wilson recently shared her uplifting personal experience with the moral depravity of Hollywood power players.
Wilson rose to fame as the all-new “funny fat girl” in movies like “Bridesmaids,” “Pitch Perfect,” and the severely underrated Sacha Baron Cohen masterpiece, “Grimsby.”
Observe:
Hilarious, right?
But then something happened. Rebel decided she didn’t want to die of heart disease by the age of 40, so she decided to get thin.
Unfortunately, Rebel’s team of managers didn’t share her vision for a long and healthy life because she was “earning millions of dollars being the funny fat girl.”
Yes, her untimely death from a heart attack would have put an end to the money train too, but like all Hollywood scumbags, Wilson’s managers were willing to take that risk. Playing with a person’s life is one thing, but you don’t screw with the money train.
“I got a lot of pushback from my own team actually, here in Hollywood, when I said, ‘OK, I’m going to do this year of health, I feel like I’m really going to physically transform and change my life,’” Wilson told BBC Breakfast.
“And they were like, ‘why? Why would you want to do that?’ Because I was earning millions of dollars being the funny fat girl and being that person.”
Hey, remember the #MeToo era when Hollywood vowed to combat sexism and support all women? It turns out they just meant no more casting couch stuff. Exploiting them for the almighty dollar is still cool. Besides, Hollywood has moved on. Backing those transgender folks is where it’s at now, baby, and there are only so many causes Hollywood can rally behind at one time.
Anyway, Rebel Wilson told her management team to take a long, jagged stick and [CENSORED BY MANAGEMENT].
This is Rebel Wilson today:
Yeah. She used to be funny. Now she’s funny and smokin’ hot.
Update: Hollywood executives have apologized for their insensitivity. They’d like Rebel Wilson to star in a new romantic comedy that’s currently in development. Of course, they’ll need her to lose 25 pounds first.
https://omny.fm/shows/hammer-and-nigel-show/is-this-anything-5
