Counting. Numbers Arithmetic. These are the challenges in life that destroy self-esteem, wreck marriages and keep Americans locked in low-wage jobs for the duration of their working life.
But there is a far greater question we should be asking ourselves, America: Who concocts these arbitrary number doctrines anyway?
Sick, disgusting fascists, that’s who! People who think they can control society by imposing nonsensical rules upon innocent persons for the purpose of making our world a brutal land of number-filled tyranny.
Case in point: This clip of a portly woman seeking to purchase a dozen donuts from her local fried dough establishment. One dozen donuts equal “12” in this fascist store, but our portly patriot refuses to yield to their demands to exit the store. She’s not going to budge until she receives the full 50 donuts that any person with a fourth-grade education would expect when ordering a full dozen donuts.
And by the way, don’t try to sneak any of at old-fashioned” crap into the box or she’ll take a ball bat to the soda dispenser.
Quite an experience, no? Just remember: her vote counts every bit as much as yours.
Now, enjoy the latest selection of broadcast excellence from the Hammer and Nigel Show.