Each year, dozens of celebrities and public figures around the globe pull the “Do you know who I am?” card. It is a ceremonial self-declaration of being an a*hat that is rooted in rich tradition.
Sadly, this ritual of pompous performance is commonly conducted in a semi-private setting between two people: a**hat and recipient of a**hat’s verbal abuse and intimidation tactics. But thanks to the affordability of high-quality consumer-grade audio and video recording equipment, more and more of these blessed incidents are being captured on camera for the widespread enjoyment of a grateful public.
Florida Republican Congressional candidate Martin Hyde recently blessed Sarasota police officer Julia Beskin with an unsolicited performance of the “Do you know who I am?” sacrament.
Hyde was pulled over for texting while driving and speeding on Valentine’s Day.
Known to himself as a man of action, the Florida Republican seized this rare opportunity to behave in a manner that would increase his near nonexistent celebrity while simultaneously destroying his political career.
“You are making career decisions,” Hyde tells officer Beskin at one point. “ll just call the Chief. You know who I am, right?”
Hyde later asks officer Beskin, who is a Latvian immigrant, if she was worried about her citizenship status.
“Is it your Russian immigrant status that makes you talk to people like this?” Hyde declares with a level of pride that can only be achieved through decades of dedication to the development of a complete and total lack of self-awareness.
Behold:
Hyde, who has an impressive 145 followers on Instagram, was ultimately given three tickets for failure to provide registration, speeding, and texting.
Pro-Tip: If you have your professional sights set on enjoying unpleasant encounters with self-important a**hats first-hand, experts say a career as a Maitre d’, hotel manager, nightclub bouncer, restaurant server, security professional, or law-enforcement officer will greatly increase your odds of checking this life-enriching experience off your bucket list.
Hammer and Nigel have more personal anecdotes about encounters with celebrity and non-celebrity a**hats in the clip below.
