New York Governor Andrew Cuomo, a renowned killer of elderly people, tearfully stepped before the media’s cameras Wednesday and delivered a heartfelt message to the people of his state: “I’m not going to resign.”
Cuomo, now accused of inappropriate conduct by at least three women, undoubtedly brought a great sense of relief to #MeToo victims around the globe with his endearing words of comfort.
“I was elected by the people of New York. I am going to serve the people of New York,” Cuomo defiantly declared.
But Cuomo DOES recognize the harm he’s caused. Thus, even though he’s “taking responsibility” by suffering no consequences whatsoever for his inexcusable abuse of women, he’s at least seen the light and will turn from his ways.
“I do not believe I have ever done anything in my public career that I am ashamed of,” Cuomo said.
Okay, so maybe he still needs to take a little more time for personal reflection. We’re sure he’ll come around… We’re pretty sure he’ll come around… Yeah, probably not.
Be patient with Cuomo. First of all, he’s not all that bright. Secondly, he’s just going through what we at the Mock n’ Rob Show consider the official “Four Stages of an Exposed Sexual Predator,” as scientifically determined via multiple viewings of Chris Hansen’s famed “To Catch a Predator” series – a glorious program that introduced America to this fine citizen:
What are the “Four Stages of an Exposed Sexual Predator” you inquisitively ask?
- Denial
- I Was Just Joking
- I Did It; I Am Guilty But It Isn’t That Bad/I’m Getting Help.
- I’m Guilty AF And I Throw Myself On The Mercy Of The Court.
Your radio friends, Mock n’ Rob, explain the four stages and where Governor Cuomo currently lies in the sliding scale of skeeviness in the clip below. Click to listen. Click to enjoy. Click because we asked nicely.
https://omny.fm/shows/mock-rob/what-we-knew-was-coming-indeed-came-to-light-yeste
