Lance Armstrong and Andrew Yang Battle For Most Pathetic


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Lance Armstrong and Andrew Yang Battle For Most Pathetic

Lance thinks he's racing VP Mike Pence, Yang calls President Trump a 'fat slob.' Just another day in 2019 America

Photo Credit: Allen Berezovsky and Drew Angerer \ Getty Images

Lance Armstrong is the guy who used to ride a bicycle. I once was enamored with the Lance Armstrong story. The Tour De France is not an easy race. It is remarkably difficult, and to finish - nevermind win! - is an enormous accomplishment. An entire team sacrifices so that one person can get all the glory. Lance Armstrong was tha guy getting the glory. He was a phenom, and was amazing.

And then we learned that Lance Armstrong was using performance enhancing drugs to be able to get ahead.

Gross, horrific, awful; He got the glory, the money, the fame, the success. Team members and competitors were robbed of the opportunity to benefit from victory. Opportunity stolen from them by this cheater, this fraud, this huckster— Lance Armstrong. 

What I didn’t know was that he was also a petty jerk. Lance Armstrong tweeted the following:

Screen Shot of tweet from Lance Armstrong about VP Mike Pence

This is Lance Armstrong, bragging on Twitter, that he rode his bicycle faster than the Vice President of the United States. Mike Pence is out for a Saturday bike ride, and Lance Armstrong is making a competition out of it? This is more than ridiculous; it's pathetic, and embarrassing for Lance. The blowback was intense, and he didn't think he deserved it. He defended himself by accusing people of not being able to take a joke. But he did clarify that, yes, indeed, he did “blow his doors off.” I mean, why bother with humility when you can get one over on the Vice President?

Well, just when I thought it couldn’t get more pathetic, Democratic Candidate Andrew Yang said, "Hold My Freedom Dividend.” Yang has come across as one of the more rational, calm, cool and collected Presidential candidates. He was going to bring a new view and a new look. But in Iowa, in a crowded field, he needs to get his name in the papers. 

At the Iowa State Fair, where the candidates go to see and be seen, Yang is asked if he was enjoying the fair food. He says he has to watch what he eats while he is on the campaign trail because he needs to stay in Presidential form, which is a perfectly reasonable answer. But he doesn’t stop. Oh no:


It wasn’t enough to get a little silly, and get a dig in on the President’s weight. He had to get in another about Trump beating him in an eating contest, and Trump being better than him at holding down hot air balloons. He challenges Trump to any physical competition and ends it all by saying the American people would, " to see you pass out running a mile. 

And just like that Andrew Yang proves himself to be an even bigger yutz than Lance Armstrong. Is Yang really going to win the Presidency by calling Donald Trump a slob? Yang wants to be president, and he's doing the thing that people like him scream about Donald Trump doing.

You decide. What’s more pathetic? Lance Armstrong riding his bike faster than Mike Pence or is it Andrew Yang calling the President a fat slob?

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