Joaquin Phoenix is more than just the most brilliant actor of his generation, he’s also a vegan!
Oh yes! And Oscar boy is more than just a vegan too! He’s one of those annoying vegans who tells you right before you’re about to chomp into a juicy and flavorful flesh patty of goodness at your favorite burger joint that, “Did you know that cow probably suffered its entire life under substandard conditions and lived in terror just so you could consume its soul on a gluten-free bun?”
And Joaquin “Every Burger Has a Story” Phoenix is more than just PETA pest who lays a guilt trip on you if you so much as look at an animal glutenous lust in your eyes! He’s one of those PETA pests who rounds up a camera crew to go steals cows and calves from slaughterhouses.
And after he’s “rescued” random cows who may or may not have been deeply depressed and eagerly anticipating their doom, old do-gooder Phoenix tells you crap like, “The difference in energy between the cow persons at the slaughterhouse and the cow persons at the cow sanctuary is palpable!”
Energy? Souls? COW PERSONS?
Spare me. This is an animal that spends hours on end each day licking the inside of its nostrils.
Oh look! Here’s Joaquin now!
Now look, Joaquin… Actually, that cow is kind of cute. You know what? Forget I said anything.
Just listen to this segment from Hammer and Nigel instead.
https://omny.fm/shows/hammer-and-nigel-show/is-this-anything-6
